Mercury Retrograde Roast — May 4

Mercury isn't actually moving backwards. It just looks that way from Earth — the same way your last text-thread reads weirder every time you scroll up.

What's actually happening

Mercury is on the inside lane. When it laps Earth, our angle on it flips, and the planet appears to drift the other way for about three weeks. That's the whole physics of it.

What it isn't: an excuse to email your ex.

The week ahead

• Communication will be normal. Slightly more typo-prone.
• Your phone will not betray you. It's been doing that all year.
• Tech will glitch. Tech glitches every Wednesday. Mercury just gets the bad PR.
• Plans will change. This is also called living.

If you must blame the sky, blame it kindly. The sky has been very patient with you.

Want to see how this transit lands in your chart specifically? StarBind reads it against your natal Mercury — not a vibe.